Review 58: Man-Thing DVD

A Crying Shame.

Sigh. Sometimes these reviews are no fun to write. While it's fun to laugh at pop idol and the like, and the losers that watch it, it's sometimes hard to write negative one star reviews on things you desperatly wanted to like.

Take Man-Thing. Dunno if you've read any of The Curmudgeon's reviews before, but I'm a comic book movie collector; anything live-action related to superheroes or comics I'm there. Sometimes its a drag, buying stuff you know you'll hate (Catwoman, Popeye, Batman and Robin) but I really did have high hopes for this.

Why? Well, Man-Thing isn't exactly a well known comic book figure, so I reckoned the people responsible were creating a labour of love, a movie based on a character THEY love. How wrong I was. I doubt the idiots responsible for this mess even thumbed through a few pages of a Man-Thing comic.

So, instead of Man-Thing, a tragic anti-hero who feeds on raw emotion (hate, anger, fear), we get a zero imagination monster movie where, for no reason at all, Man-Thing attacks teenagers and hicks in the swamps.

The ONE thing they managed to get right was Man-Thing's original name - Ted Sallis. But they still mananged to screw that up. In the comic he was a scientist working on a follow up to the Super Soldier serum (that created Captain America, fact fans) when it all goes wrong - in this he's an Indian chief who, like, angered the Gods or something.

Yup - an Indian Chief. Called Ted.

What's really galling is there's so much potential here. The acting is half decent, the location of the swamps is fine and creepy, and Man-Thing doesn't look at all bad, and the film's an 18 certificate so there's no need to tone down the violence. If they had just got someone with a passion and knowledge of the comics,instead of some talentless hack who just wanted to make a pointless monster mash but with a Marvel name tacked on, they really could have had something special. Instead they've made a sub-par horror film, something to watch at 2am and laugh at.

I'm going to go punch someone in the throat.