Review 72: Band Aid 20 - Do They Know It's Christmas?

Bland-Aid.

Well, you know what they say about sequels, don't you? And that rings true here - whilst I'm sure they were aiming for a Terminator 2 kind of sequel (glossier, more expensive, self-aware but ultimately lacking the class and originality of the first part) they instead created a Matrix: Reloaded sequel - bloated, over-produced and downright awful.

Fun fact - do you know they had Paul McCartney in here and didn't want him to sing, because he was too old? True story - they wanted to appeal to the young audience out there, so they just had him play guitar and mug to the camera for the video. Perhaps the idiots that decided NOT to have one of the biggest influences in music EVER sing forgot about the "Perfect Day" charity single from a few years back (that years biggest selling single, no less), which had the likes of Tom Jones, David Bowie, Suzanne Vega, Elton John, Tammy Waynette and other older artists (as well as new talent) perform on there, and "the kids" didn't seem to mind then. They sure as hell wouldn't care if Paul McCartney (who they would've least have HEARD of) sang.

But I digress. Let them get the likes of McCartney, Tom Yorke and Damon Albarn in and NOT sing. Who needs them, when you've got the likes of, nnnnnng, Will Young, Dido, Joss Stone and Justin Hawkins singing? It's like some music executive somewhere compiled a Super-Suck list and managed to get them all to sing. The likes of Bono and Robbie Williams aside, I doubt that, in twenty years time, we'll still be talking about Busted, Sugababes and Rachel Stevens.

And special mention MUST go to the rap (because, hey, rap music is what ALL young people like and listen to, so let's have a completely out of place, un-neccasary and laughable rap in the middle). Dizzy Rascal - my hat goes off to you - you turned a bad song into a TERRIBLE one with your pathetic nasal squawking.

The worst thing about Band Aid 20 is the self-important, "THIS IS A CLASSIC" attitude that engulfs the whole project. When Bono sings His Famous Line it sounds like he's either trying to make it last as long as possible, or possibly trying to squeeze a wardrobe from between his buttocks. Either way - not a good listen.

You want to give to charity? Fine - be my guess. Put money in the tin of some guy on the street. Donate on the internet. Just don't give this sorry mess any of your attention.