Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Dweller Contribution: Invisible Wolfman Writes...




One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest (And Into The Window)

Hello fellow Fortress dwellers! InvisibleWolfMan here, taking a chance on his first blog entery ANYwhere (thanks, The Curmudgeon!)

Conspiracy theories. Some are cool like Area 51and The Men In Black (no Will Smiths here). Some are confusing with their political ties like who really shot JFK and the events surrounding Sept.11th. Some are just pure trash like faking the moon landing of 1969 and George Lucas not owning a single print of the original theatrical versions of the STAR WARS Trilogy (how was that process of color correction comparisons for the 2004 S.E.'s, Georgie? That's nice...). I like to read them, not that I buy into ALL of them, but one must realize that every GOOD theory has to be based on some truths. I enjoy conspiracy theories as a way to think "what if..." every now and then just to keep me on my toes

Then there's a friend of mine who's adapted them as a way of life.

Oh, if only I could say he was laughable or even (dare I use it) "devilishly charming" with these theories! Unfortunately, it's not the case. Nope....he's out to save my very soul along with the rest of the world in an effort to expose the truth and name the one individual who's behind it all because he's not out to make any money with his book he's writing on it at all because that's superficial and against his belief that he just wants the truth to finally be exposed.

Seriously.

It was harmless at first, listening to him. A "times have changed since we were young" here, a "government ignoring the people" there....typical discussion for almost anyone out there. Then he started getting deeper...and deeper...and deeper still. It went from talking about how we don't agree with Bush's actions as of late to "the Vatican has secret assassins." Yep....assassins.

Fantastic.

Now, had it been the only time I would have laughed it off. Sadly, it seemed every time I met up with him he had something new to add to it. I'm not gonna go into specifics as it'd take FOREVER to type up all that he said...and I barely remember a quarter of it. Let's just say that he's concluded that the Catholics are in league with Satan. Bizarre as it sounds, that's only the surface!

Talking with him has become such a chore that I dread seeing him anymore. Sometimes I have no way out of that as we both have children that are roughly the same age and it's good for our child to have a playmate in a similar situation (we are Americans living abroad in Finland). And with his recent decision who's behind all of (dare I even type it) "this" has also thrown me for a real loop. A celebrity. One celebrity that because of his religion, a movie he directed and a line from one of his most famous films , has been "stealing" my friend's "creativity."

Jesus H. Tapdancing Christ.

This has forced me to realize that although I have a long, quiet patience on putting up with his nonsense....if he dared to tell me any more the next time I would probably be forced to tell him off once and for all. I may try to be understanding to other people and their personal beliefs, but when I think that someone has finally hit a dangerous point (and believe me...he has) there's a time to draw the line. Too many hours doing too much research on this has made him paranoid.

So a word of the wise, Fortress dwellers....if you hear a conspiracy theory and your friend wants to explain further than you're willing to go:

JUST SAY NO!

3 comments:

The Curmudgeon said...

Well there you have it folks - a little slice of history for you there. The very first non-Curmudgeon written entry into The Fortress Of Solitude. I think I'm filling up.

I actually really like the moon landing theory. I watched a TV show about it and at the end was, I dunno.. kinda convinced. It's certainly a theory that makes a lot of sense.. you know.. in theory.

As for your conundrum.. hmmmm... that IS a tricky one. What to do when a friend or associate becomes just too damn.. mad? I don't think there IS a real answer to that one, certainly not one I have. Maybe you could agree to keep in touch as long as you both keep things light. You know, how are you, nice weather we're having, and stray away from "those dang pesky Catholic Satanists."

Thanks for the entry, Wolfman! Feel free to contribute another, and any other Dwellers out there wishing to follow in those unseen hairy footsteps - just mail me your topic of choice (and accompanying pic if you like) and it'll be on here for all to see.

Now then - anyone else wishing to comment on Wolfman's post?

The Curmudgeon said...

I gotta ask - who's the celebrity?

The Curmudgeon said...

Pffff - I know.

Hulk Hogan.