Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Review 32: The Darkness - Permission To Land





A rock band for people who don't like rock music.

The Curmudgeon is from Britain, and as a result I'm not sure of how the tastes in the good ol' US of A (as absolutley no-one says) are, but for about six months you couldn't move for people lining up to tell you how much they loved The Darkness.

The Darkness, then. A band who seemingly consist of ONE song, "I Believe In A Thing Called Love". This album sold stupid amounts, but ALL people seem to know is that single (and don't get me started on the HORRENDOUS Christmas single).

So, one song - and one selling point - they dress and sound like every 70's cliched rock band should. So singer Justin Hawkins wears a catsuit and pouts and licks at the camera, and the guitar player has a comedy moustache. The songs are perfect for idiots that don't actually like rock music, and like something to "rock out to" once in a while (they're the same idiots that bang their head, Waynes World style, to Bohemian Rhapsody).

This song will be played in your local supermarket. Your mother will hum along to it in the car on the way to work. It will be covered on Pop Idol - this, my friends, is not rock music.

And it's not good music either. You want to see a one-trick pony, boys and girls? Step right up and look at these ugly goons - more of a novelty act than the Crazy f***ing Frog.

Let's place our bets on the SECOND album, then. If it ever happens, just how BAD will it be? Time will tell, but right now, The Darkness are looking to be more dated and naff than Justin's spangly trousers.

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