Stupidity beyond belief.
It's never a good sign when the blurb on the front of the box makes you burst into mocking laughter. Some tag-lines in movies are classics, and are as famous as the movies themselves. You know what I mean..
"In Space No One Can Hear You Scream" from Alien.
"Crime Is A Disease. Meet The Cure" from Cobra.
"Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid" from The Fly.
"He Is The Master Of Quack Fu" from Howard The Duck.
OK, not really the last one. But you get the idea, so when you see Jaws IV, with "this time its personal" you can't help but laugh. So, there's a shark out there pi**ed off at the whole Brody family for killing.. uh, I dunno, his family? So he hunts down said family, one by one (ignoring other swimmers!) in an attempt to get revenge.
Ahem. No, really.
Now, I'm sorry, there's a lot of things I'm willing to accept in movies - but that's just a step too far into "stupid" for me. All was missing were scenes of the shark down in his lair, shaking his fin upwards towards the surface shouting "I'll get you for this, Brody!"
It makes NO sense. Not one little bit. Especially when the whole family MOVES from New York to the Bahamas - and the shark follows them! How did it know they were going? Did it tap their phones? Read their mail?
Tellingly, Roy Scheider is nowhere to be seen in this movie, leaving it all up to his boring wife to handle the stalking shark. And Michael Caine pops up too, for pretty much no reason other than to tell us, "phwoar, that shark's breath stinks."
Oh, and speaking of the shark - he roars like a lion in this movie. Not once, but a handful of times. I didn't know sharks could do that. Then again, I didn't know sharks bore grudges over the deaths of family members from over 10 years ago either. Learn something new every day, eh?
Lastly, the director has the shark "popping" out of the water so much it starts to wear a little thin. In the first film, when the shark pops out of the water it's a jump out of the seat moment, and clue that indeed Sherrif Brody is "gonna need a bigger boat". Here, the shark is almost like one of those whack-a-mole games.
A complete waste of time. Don't be tempted.
1 comment:
Interesting factoid here - did you know there are actually TWO different endings to Jaws IV? No, no joke - some DVD's have an ending where the guy in the sharks mouth dies (surprisingly) where in some DVD's he doesn't. And no-one can work out which is which.
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