Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Review 37: Melanie C - Beautiful Intentions





Oh for God's sake GO AWAY!

Lord have mercy, but are we ever going to be rid of these damn Spice Girls? When are they going to realise that NO-ONE CARES ANYMORE? At least Posh had the good sense to give it up after releasing the least amount of horrific records, but the likes of Geri and ol' wonky-eye here just won't give it up.

Let's be honest, here - the one interesting thing about Melanie C was her eating disorder. We all had a good chuckle, but now it seems she's over that - that little bit of publicity got stale and she moved on from it. So what does that leave us with?

I'll tell you - dire attempts at being either "edgy" or "real", and sounding absolutley nothing like either. She's always had embarrassing songs (I Turn To You, with its hilariously bad video and naff lyrics, Goin' Down - quite possibly her very own ticket to Hell, that homeless thing she did, with the classic "I can't live without my phone - you don't even have a home" line.. I don't think Bob Dylan has anything to worry about, luv), and there's nothing as wretched here.. in fact, there's nothing much at all to talk about. It's just boring. A record of empty air, from a girl with nothing to say and no-one to listen to it.

She was dropped by her record label and had to use her own funds to make this album, you know. Result? Album flopped, and she had to release her second single on the internet only due to "lack of interest". Now what's that saying about a fool and their money.....?

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